The Disco Under Lake Erie

Hirsute Chartreuse Pursuit

27 March 2022

  • I used to tell the other kids at school that my dad was a treasure hunter. That was an exaggeration. He scuba dived the Great Lakes, searching sunken yachts & freighters for antiques—the plates we're eating off of came from a sailboat at the bottom of Lake Erie—but once he found
    12/27/21 10:34am
  • a series of tunnels under Lake Erie. He dove and swam and mapped until he got to the center. There he found an impossibly deep underwater pit. It was much warmer than the surrounding lake, too hot to dive. And it glowed orange in the day, green at night.
    1/1/22 3:54pm
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  • Suddenly, it dawned on him that he’d read about this particular underwater pit before. Through one of his regular late night internet rabbit hole deep dives, he’d stumbled upon an article that said whoever bathed in the pit at night would turn a bright chartreuse.
    2/19/22 9:35pm
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  • Which sounded like fun. It sure was warm water, but this was his golden opportunity, and he wasn’t about to pass it up. He swam over to the pit,
    2/19/22 11:57pm
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  • With the lifeguard snoozing now was his chance. He tiptoed out of the water, past the no trespassing sign, and lowered himself into the hole. Immediately, he realized why this place was special. The walls were gem-lined and he heard the low hum of dance music. Now, for the score.
    2/20/22 12:44am
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  • He rigged the dance floor with explosives and the beat was about to go with a bang. As the music approached its climax the ticking began to go faster and faster. The DJ was about to drop the bass, hard. And it was at that moment the disco floor blew up. They all had a real blast.
    3/27/22 2:02pm
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The End