Moon Clown Town

The deafening roar of a man being launched across a field by a singular punch was familiar, yet shocking.

“Not again”, I thought, then flipped on my bullhorn. “Sir! Just because the moon’s low gravity gives you superhero-like powers doesn’t mean you’re allowed to assault citizens of the Lunar Republic!” Then I thought to myself “bloody tourists from Earth!”

There just had to be a better job in the Lunar Republic. Starting off in shuttle gate security was one thing, but to still be here two years later? Other than the occasional drunken tourist, nothing exciting ever happens… Suddenly I noticed something new across the pod.

It started with cacophonous musical instruments and the rhythmic thump of marching. As the sounds came into focus I could make out the looping melody of a calliope, a brass section and huge base drum. Slowly the sea of tourists parted and I saw my worst nightmare; space clowns.

At the head of the space clown army was Fleep Florp the Annihilator. Many a world had suffered under his cream pie bombardments and seltzer-blasting armies. No one died from his attacks, but he left his victims annoyed & messy. He'd covered my homeworld with an infinite hanky.

And that was his biggest blunder. As soon as he touched down we airlifted two of the four hanky corners and made a giant burrito out of Fleep. By the time we injected refried beans, he and his clowns were begging for mercy. That day the galaxy took a circus-sized sigh of relief.