I take a deep breath and I get real high

Once upon a time there was a little sus living in a mansion

so big you can run around it. The little sus lived among us and was a little sus indeed. A few crewmates saw the mansion and instantly decided to live here.

Li'l Sus got along well with most of his new roommates. They had a dish-washing schedule & kept the place clean; that was enough for Sus. But there was one roomie that he didn't care for. Big Brad Balaban. Big Brad's drinks left rings on the coffee table & he loved 4 Non Blondes.

“You know I’m a Non Blondie all the way!”, was the first thing Big Brad said to him. “I’ve seen 4 Non Blondes live almost 100 times!” He had a huge collection of anachronistic hats and wore one every day. It was obnoxious, just like his favorite band.

"Let me guess," I asked Big Brad. "You have some kind of embarrassing Non Blondie tattoo?" BB tipped his gaudy fedora, unbuttoned his shirt, and revealed an image that chills me to this day: an uncannily detailed crosshatch of NB, BB, and me, arm-in-arm, crying with delight.