Witches and Toothpaste and Cats, Oh My!

20 March 2021

  • Never leave a container of mint balls next to a witch's cauldron. But the trick to this is, what exactly is a witch? When I first came across this warning, I avoided every kitchen of every woman senior citizen that I came across. I even avoided my grandma. But a witch is nothing
    Kara S2/13/21 2:10am
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  • if not surprising. Whatever you think a witch might be, she is probably not. Whatever you think she couldn’t be, she almost certainly is. And she either hates to love mints, or loves to hate them.
    Sean K avatarSean K2/13/21 2:26am
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  • However, even a witch is not immune to the disgusting flavor of orange juice after toothpaste. In fact, it’s been speculated that witches are even more sensitive to this taste than your average person. This is how I hatched my plan to take down the witch on the hill.
    Sunny A avatarSunny A2/13/21 6:24pm
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  • Still in lockdown mode, I had acquired copious amounts of both items, grabbed as much and started mixing. Problem was how would I get the witch to take it....
    K T avatarK T2/14/21 10:38pm
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  • After the crude potion had time to seal itself to the sleep cycle, it was ready to be applied. The
    Josh C avatarJosh C2/15/21 3:20pm
  • lockdown would end, and I would be the one to do it. I pulled out my spellbook and began the incantation.
    KW T avatarKW T2/21/21 10:20pm
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  • I read the lines like it was second nature, almost absentmindedly. “Diabolus autem minimum…” The uninitiated would be surprised to learn the words aren’t magical. “…reditus infernis vestris…” It’s the intention that works wonders.
    A P avatarA P2/24/21 7:28pm
  • I put down the spell book and waited. Nothing happened. Maybe my intention wasn’t strong enough. Maybe I didn’t want it badly enough. Maybe I didn’t use enough tiger whiskers. I dropped one more into the potion and the cauldron bubbled.
    Tracie+L M2/27/21 4:26pm
  • I stared into the vile broth with glee, it was working! The shapeshifting scum floating on the top took the form of various catlike beasts as the shadows in the room drew closer. A sound above caused me to glance at the ceiling, a cat peered down at me through a small square hole
    zeej Q avatarzeej Q3/1/21 5:32pm
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  • but then disappeared. Now the scum writhed again and more feline shapes emerged, all but one showing a cat about to pounce. And then, with a growing sense of unease I saw, in the middle, a crude human form. I slowly looked up to where I had seen the cat moments before and gasped
    Paz W3/10/21 11:09pm
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  • And threw it out the window and said...
    Emma M avatarEmma M3/18/21 4:00pm
  • "You've been defenestrated!" The sound of maniacal laughter covered the soft footsteps coming up from behind. Alas, no more applied spellcraft for this one!
    C. S avatarC. S3/18/21 5:45pm
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The End