Maraschino to Mars

Wheaties. Olives. Spaghetti. Garbanzo Beans. AAA batteries. All-purpose flour. Toilet paper. Scissors. Sugar cookies. Advil. Dishtowels. Dark chocolate. Tomato paste. Peanut butter. Saltines. Heavy-duty trash bags. Maraschino cherries. Soy sauce. Shoelaces.

Naming your child can be so difficult, Fred thought. His wife was due in a few weeks and had tasked him with naming their infant. Fred was a grocery store enthusiast. Maraschino McNally, that has a ring to it!

Improbably, Maraschino McNally, grew up to be the coolest kid in her class. She was not only Prom Queen, but Captain of the Badminton Squad, and a founding member of the Robot Wars Chapter. Thus, it was all the more surprising when Maraschino announced to her family the big news.

“I’ve been selected as the first student astronaut for the Mars mission. I leave for training tomorrow.” Her father’s jaw dropped open in shock, and of course, her mother began weeping immediately. Only her brother Milk Dud was happy. “Great! I get your room!” he chortled. But

she herself immediately swirled around and ran up to her room. She couldn't bear thinking about having to answer their barrage of questions that would surely iron her to the floor. She started packing, throwing in the emergency duct tape that would help in her Mars training. Next

she grabbed her socks. Mars was going to be cold and absolutely no one wants cold feet while traversing the galaxy. Once packed and ready, she exited her house and approached the news crews. The questions flooded in, but this was her time. She was ready. She had to be...