Long Term Scare Facilities

Tara walked through the door, joints aching, eyes bleary, and was greeted by a scene of pure chaos: candy wrappers everywhere, muddy footprints on the floor. Hanging from the ceiling fan were two masks tethered together by a boa.

Well, I guess Halloween was a hit this year, thought Tara. Her parents were church-going folk, except on Halloween, which was their time to shine. She couldn’t believe the nursing home would permit such extravaganzas.

Walkers were decked out to the nines with glitter, flashing green lights, gourds as far as the eye could see. Candy lined the cafeteria tables and the nursing home sitting room was atwitter with spooky ghost stories. This was a unique visit to my parents, indeed.

Tara had never seen so many old people wearing so much makeup. She looked around the dramatically lit room, finally spotting her father behind the blood red punch bowl with floating candy bats. “Over here pops!” Tara said. Tara’s dad flashed a big smile revealing gigantic fangs.

It appears he replaced his regular dentures with some fang-y custom ones. “Lost my normal ones” he said. “Works great for meat though. Where’s your costume? Our group theme won’t work without a zebra.”

Thank goodness I had the menagerie of animal costumes that I kept stored in my van. With a quick but awkward change in the car, I arrived back in the nursing home, ready to party all night. I guess aging wouldn’t be so scary after all.