MC Wonderland

After months of searching the desert & the loss of my left pinkie, the Magic Mirror was mine. I could ask it any question I wanted & it would reveal all the Secrets of the Universe to me. "Mirror, Mirror," I said, "I must know—why can't flies find the window out after flying in?"

“Do you want the serious answer, or the joke answer?” the Magic Mirror replied. “The serious answer?” “How should I know, I’m not a fly — I’m a mirror! Have you ever thought about —“ “Hold on,” I interrupted, “I thought you were supposed to hold all the answers?”

“Look inside me, Alice! Look! Through the looking glass! The answer has been within you all along!” “So what you’re saying is,” I asked, “that I am the answer to all of life’s problems?” “Yes! That’s exactly it!” the mirror cried in joy, “Anything is possible! Just do it, Alice!”

Yes! I say yes! A golden microphone appeared in my hand, and I didn’t hesitate to belt it out. “My name is Alice, let me take you through the looking glass! I have no malice, but the haters can all kiss my ass! Drink this, drink that, fall down the rabbit hole!”