Harbinger of Saltines

"So here’s the thing," says the crow, "if you’ve never heard of me, hear me now. I’m your least expected fortune teller. I’m the one that brings death and despair. Yield to me, so I shall spare you from your doomed fate." "Foolish," says the human.

“What was that, mortal?” “You heard me,” the human says, “Foolish.” “Is that how you treat the bringer of death, destruction and despair? Show some respect — hey are those seeds? Caw caw caw gimme!”

I tossed a few seeds near the door, the avian demon alighted and pecked them up. I tossed a handful of seeds onto the porch, and he hopped out. As he snacked, I shut the sliding door, latched it, and placed a broomstick in the track.

"That's that," I said & flopped into my easy chair to resume reading the day's paper. The wind howled outside & sleet rapped at the windows. I could hear the devil-bird whining, scratching at the sliding door like a puppy. I tried to ignore it, but the sad moans & sighs got to me

so much that I let the poor thing in my room, where the fireplace crackled and the cat purred softly. Then the cat got up and clawed at the devil-bird, hissing aggressively. The bird pecked at it. I had to intervene. “Alright, you two, there will be no fighting in my house!”

Over time they grew more tolerant. They shared a common interest: crackers. Working together, the bird would push the package off the shelf, the cat would open it up. Each delicious golden cracker softened their differences, and many destroyed boxes later they were best friends.