Put the Key Lime in the Coconut

A palm tree was standing alone in the sand. A blow of wind moved it enough for a coconut to get loose. It snapped off the tree, rolled down on the tree's trunk and made a soft thump as it fell in the sand, quite deeply so. It didn't break at all but it got some sand on top of it.

A child come running by and didn't see the coconut buried in the sand. One of the toes then slammed into the coconut shell and caused the child to topple over.

“Aw, nuts.” The child then saw the coconut. Why not crack one open? And so the child cracked it open with a rock and drank a most refreshing drink.

"If you like piña coladas," the child began to sing, "And gettin' caught in Bahrain. If you're not dancin' polka while water swirls down the drain. If you like makin' doves & bobwhites interbreed with technique, then I'm the love that you've looked for—write to me, ya big freak."

I shuddered, trying to keep my emotions off my face. You see, I was caught in Bahrain. It took 7 months of wrangling, 3 attorneys, and a phone call from a Senator to get me out.

And once I got out I was back to committing the same thing once again. What were they going to do? Stop me again? I retired to a remote island where I spent the rest of my days.