Taylor gardened while his wife and kids slept. The quiet morning hours seemed to be the only time these days he could find for this solitary pleasure. He had just finished weeding his last plant bed when an owl, one bigger than he’d ever seen, swooped in and stole his shears.

The operation was long overdue. He approached the front desk. After the insurance pleasantries they said to wait on the side of the room by the turtle themed poster. He turned around and there it was. “EXPERIENCE IS WISDOM” it said, with a smiling cartoon turtle underneath.