Who’s on fourth?

"And that is the formula for a quadratic equation. Say it with me now: X equals..." So this is how I die, thought Jonah, sinking lower in his desk. Another tragic victim of math. TAP. Something hit the back of his head and fell to the floor. A crumpled ball of paper.

Jonah turned around. It was Susie. She put a finger to her lips to indicate he shouldn't say anything. Johan unfurled the ball of paper. It read, "Math is so boring it'll kill us, yeah? Meet me in the hallway after class if you want to live." Jonah raised an eyebrow. What?

His curiosity piqued, he met her. She started talking about the 1979 Yankees lineup while leading him to an unused room behind the stage in the auditorium. There were 7 students already there. Once the door was shut, Susie said “we can speak freely here about New Math.”

He instinctively frowned and then chuckled, “New math? Statistics in baseball has been kind of a thing for a bit….” A stern voice rang out, “That was simply the lure, the gateway.” Another chimed in, “New Math is beyond statistics or calculus, it is PARALLEL to all things.”

“How come I’ve never heard of this new math? You’re definitely gaslighting me.” The younger boy scoffs.

“Well,” replied the man, “Everything is new when one can’t even calculate the sum of 2+2.” “It’s 4 by the way."

"It's for what?" "No, it's four." "For what?" "No. Four. F-O-U-R." "Eff-oh-you-are what?" "I'm getting irritated, that's what." "Ha—that's what I say whenever I do math." "What's that?" "Math? It's a field of knowledge concerned with numbers & geometry." Vladimir & Estragon exit.