A cruller fate awaits

Fading off to sleep she was startled by the sound of her ringer. Who could be calling this late? Bleary-eyed she answered the phone. She heard a frantic voice on the other end, but it was one that she recognized. She couldn't believe the story. She rushed to the police station.

On her way to the police station, she remembered that she didn't actually have to go to the police station. She was using that automated service that lets you have people fake call you when you're on a bad date or something. She stopped her car.

Luckily she pulled over in front of a donut shop. The smell of those delicious torus-shaped confections tempted her to enter. "Welcome to Nick's 'Nuts", exclaimed the purveyor at the counter. "What?", she asked, "I've never seen donuts come in small, medium, and Gigante... ever".

"No matter the size of your appetite, we've got the donuts for you!" The words hung in the air with the scent of pastry. And she wondered whether this was what she'd been seeking all along. Not the donuts, but choices. Options. A gigante chance to decide something for herself.

After introspecting for what seemed like minutes, she heard a loud CRACK. Startled, she whipped around in her seat to find the donuteer had collapsed behind his case. "Are you okay?!" she gasped. "The sprinkles - t-they aren't as they seem!" the man croaked, grimacing in pain.

She knelt down beside the man as his face turned blue, picking up a sprinkle that had fallen to the floor. It didn't look out of the ordinary, but one could never be sure; after all, things aren't always what they seem. "Someone call an ambulance now!" she barked.

Seconds passed as she scanned the crowd looking for help, but nobody moved. Instead, she saw only frozen horror on their faces. Suddenly realizing her mistake, knowing it was all over, yet unable to resist - she slowly turned her own eyes back to the doomed man in her arms.

Images flooded her mind - Oscar Grant, George Floyd, Breonna Taylor - she would be another police officer vilified yet protected by laws that shielded from any responsibility for what had just happened. She refused to let another death at the hands of police unfold in this way.

Civil asset forfeiture, selective enforcement, qualified immunity… the scales of justice had tipped away from the people and she wasn't going to let that stand. She had a case at hand and was ready to make the most of her opportunity.

She went to the fatbearweek.org website to put in her vote...

It was a tough call between "Chunk", lazily catching salmon in a stream, and the bear appropriately named "747". "Hmmm" she pondered, "747 checks all my fat bear boxes, but Chunk just resonates with my vibe - I'm going Chunk." She never dreamed that vote would change her life.

Years later, as she was sitting in the backyard gazing into the forest, a sudden imposing figure appeared from the shadows of the trees. "You believed in me", murmured Chunk in his grizzly baritone. "Since losing, I have strengthened my resolve"... as he approached her hungrily.

"Oh God, what do I do?" she thought to herself, a panic rushing over her. "Oh God. Oh no. This is bad. Real bad," she continued thinking, as Chunk grew closer and closer. He chuckled with a hungry look in his eyes. "Oh God..." she thought, yet again. "Oh... WAIT! The donuts!"

The moment felt like a video game boss battle. Her heart raced. 'Last Resort' echoed through the speakers, "SUFFOCATION!...NO BREATHING!..." She lurched towards the donuts, frantically looking for a way to stop Chunk..."THIS IS MY LAST RESORT!" blared, and then, she spotted them.

Two "Men in Black"-esque shadows lurked in the corner, holding fresh glazed donuts in a glass case. It didn't seem to make any sense. Papa Roach's 'Last Resort' faded out as her eyes tried to focus in an attempt to gain clarity; Chunk seized this opportunity to make his move.

"Woof! Woof woof! Woof!" "What??" she looked searchingly into Chunk's watery, dark eyes. What was he trying to say??

Chunk ran to the garbage bin, raised up on his back heels and pushed the bin with his fore paws until it tipped over. And there it was, what she had been looking for the whole time!