Oh Deer

“I’m telling you, that’s the animal that hurt me!” Cody gestured at the unassuming beast across the lawn. “You think deer don’t have teeth?”

"Deer don't have teeth. They have dentures." said Jill, who doubted that the deer bit Cody. Then the deer shocked them both by speaking. "Hi my name is Bambi and I am an obese deer. I want to eat you because you look like my KFC." Well then. Now Jill believed Cody. They both ran.

The hunters had become the hunted. Jill couldn’t believe the flabby, sloppy deer could run so fast, but it was right on their heels. “I’m gonna eat you with barbecue sauce!” Bambi cried.

Oh deer, how the turntables. Bambi was getting ever closer to Jill, and could almost taste victory. Until a car came out of nowhere. Bambi saw this and ran head on towards the car… and got absolutely wrecked.

Emotionally, that is. The car stopped and driver ran out. “Are you ok? Omg Bambi?” It was Jill. Bambi looked up with teary eyes, and stopped bawling into its tiny hooves. “It’s time to forget the past. Let’s end this thing.” From that day forward they were the dearest of friends.